By Janet Cropper
Have you ever started towards a goal that turned out harder than you thought? It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re heading the wrong way.
We went to our favourite beach for a slow stroll. The sun was shining, but the wind was wild. It was a struggle to walk.
I sent a photo to a friend and she asked, “Wondering if you still have your hat?”
“I nearly lost it to the wind!” I replied.
That hat made me think about who we want to be. When things get tough, our sense of ourselves can be one of the first things we lose hold of.
I see this in my coaching and leadership work. A job search or promotion takes longer than planned. A change moves more slowly than expected. A new skill takes longer to put into practice.
When we can’t see progress, our doubts deepen. That’s when the limiting beliefs creep in. Are we capable? Did we really think it could be that easy? Who are we to do this?
I’ve felt it myself
When I set up NoLimits and ran our first PowerPresenting public workshop in Singapore, I thought it would be easy. Getting people to sign up was much harder than I expected, with the hotel and venue paid upfront. Some people never replied to our emails, and others let us down the night before.
Preparing my first book, The Hamster Who Danced with the Giant, has brought new lessons too. Experience doesn’t mean we stop meeting things we haven’t done before.
Here are three ways to help yourself keep going.
Accept
Harder doesn’t automatically mean it’s the wrong path for you. Try to understand what’s making it tough, without turning the difficulty into a judgement about yourself.
Try this: Write down one thing that’s harder than you expected. What, specifically, is making it difficult?
Adapt
When you walk into a headwind, smaller steps can help. If one approach isn’t working, consider another. You can change your pace and your plan while keeping your goal in sight.
Try this: List three different ways to move towards your goal. Choose one to try this week.
Advance
Small, steady steps take you closer to where you want to be. Your next step doesn’t have to solve the whole problem.
Try this: Decide on one manageable action and take it today.
“Sunshine and a headwind can arrive on the same day.”
When the wind is wild, running faster on the hamster wheel can feel safe. But it keeps you going round in circles. Pause, adjust your footing and choose your next step.
What has turned out harder than you expected, and what could help you keep going?
Moving beyond self-doubt while staying true to who you want to be is a theme of The Hamster Who Danced with the Giant.